today everyone on tumblr is writing love letters to their dads and i cant really do that because my dad is a dick
someone to smoke with
someone to drink with
someone to swear with
someone to nibble on
The word depression has such connotations, but it’s more than the sadness which coats that succession of soft consonants. It’s less of a bear trap and more of a vice; a vice that has reached it’s point of closure around your mind and around your heart and doesn’t give.
It’s a feeling in the corner of your brain, a sunken nerve in the pit of your chest. Quietly sucking out not only joy, but regulated sadness and hope until you’re left with nothing to feel except anxiety and guilt. It takes the words out of your mouth and the sincerity out of your smile, every move you make is drenched with that familiar thought, “I am a terrible thing”.